She is much too busy exploring and following his own agenda to listen to what you have to say. Here are a few tips to help toddlers stay safe and listen to you:
- Make sure she is well-rested and well-fed. Even though toddlers are able to string a few words into sentences, they usually do not have the self-awareness to realize when they are hungry or tired. Try to always take these needs into consideration. It is also important to make sure she has had enough to drink. If it is a warm day, she may need some extra water. Sometimes being slightly tired, hungry, thirsty or too hot or cold can really affect her mood and ability to “follow your rules.” Try to think through all of these things and provide what she needs. Sometimes even if you ask your toddler if she is hungry or tired, she may not say “yes” because she is lacking that self-awareness.
- Be very clear and simple in your directions. Just give one-step directions at a time, such as “Can you please put this sock on your foot?” Instead of, “Go put on your shoes and socks.”
- Speak in positive terms. Instead of saying “Don’t drop that,”say “Hold onto that.” Toddlers sometimes do not understand the negative. They may just hear “drop that” and when you get upset they do not understand.
- Get down on her level. Make sure you have her attention when you speak to her. Try to get at her eye level so she knows you are talking to you and you can be sure that you have her full attention. Try to give her your full attention when she talks to you as well.
- Use visuals along with your words. Instead of just saying, “Do you want a banana or an apple?” Hold up an banana and an apple and gesture to each one when you ask the question. She is still learning words and vocabulary and it is helpful to link a word to an object for better understanding.
- Use gestures and teach your child some sign language. Babies learn body language and gestures long before they learn to speak words, so waving goodbye as you leave, using your hands to beckon your child to come to you, and hugging your child when you say “I love you” reinforces the words.
References:
Brown, A & Fields, D. (2016). Toddler 411: Clear Anwers & Smart Advice for Your Toddler. Ingram, Colorado.
Jana. L. (2017). The Toddler Brain: Nurturing the Skills Today that Will Shape Your Child’s Tomorrow. DaCapo Press. Boston, MA.